Recovery For Abused Women

“Empowering the abused woman to recover with God's truth"

People are falliable and limited but God is infallible and unlimited!! I understand that you want to talk to your friend, husband, wife, etc. because you want someone to respond back to you but you can talk to God and He will respond back too!! Man is incapable of supplying our needs – sustaining us - so when we look to him or her to give us only what God can, we suffer unnecessarily – it causes falling out with friends, family, husbands, wives, etc. but most of all it causes us to suffer emotional distress (headaches, heartaches, depression, physical and mental illnesses, etc.)!! Therefore, let’s just make up in our minds that we are going to trust God and turn to Him instead of man!!

Remember, man is NOT our source; God is our Source!! God is the ONLY One who has the abilities to fulfill us!! Man is just one instrument God uses to bless us! Don’t depend on anybody (mother, father, sister, brother, husband, wife, children, etc.) because they might have good intentions but good intentions cannot get you out of a tight spot or pay your bills or hold you in the night when you want to be held – ONLY God can do this – Yes, God can hold you when you want to be held; He has held me when I was sick and felt all alone and in pain!! As I said before, you will save yourself sooooooooooooo many hurts, heartaches, headaches, depressed moments, disappointments, and as the insurance commercial says, “hair pulling out”! I can tell you this because throughout my life, I can even say my whole life, all I have done was depended on people, my money, or material things – I lived for these things!! And what did it get me but more emotional distressed; seven abusive marriages and used by the people I depended on! Depending on people caused me to feel rejected, abandoned, and neglected all over again which I had suffered as a child; each person who hurt me caused me to have these feelings!! Now, God is teaching me how to depend on Him and He is healing me from these emotional issues!!

I am not saying all people deliberately hurt you but some do; even the ones confessing that they are Christians – they are human! Once we except Christ as our personal Lord and Savior, we are to allow the Holy Spirit to lead and guide us - we are to be led by Him, not by our old nature!! I know none of us are perfect but we must strive to do right; we must ask God to help us in the areas we are weak in and don’t give in to the old nature – I know that is easier said than done – even Paul said the things he did not want to do he did but the things he wanted to do, he did not do – Paul said there was a war going on inside of him – the flesh (old man) was warring against the spirit man (new man)!! I know how he felt because the same thing happens to me now; so I am not blaming people for their behavior but when you know you have a problem, ask God to help you so you won’t use and hurt people!! I don’t care how spiritual a person claim to be that does not mean they will NEVER hurt you because they are human and have a free will as to whether or not they will allow the Holy Spirit to led them – to allow God full control of their life or not – that way the old sinful nature will not be able to lead!!

It is very important for that we ask God who to connect with because the enemy sends people in our lives to stop the will of God – this happened to me; the enemy sent the last guy into my life to totally destroy me (God told me)!! The enemy does not only use marriage relationships to destroy people but also friendships; any relationship where people can get close – we need to acknowledge God in ALL our ways so He can direct our path!! 

To stay out of the wrong relationships, we should seek God first and acknowledge Him before going into any relationship; this will keep us from going through hurts, rejections, abuse, and being used by people!! Also we will not fall for the first man or woman who comes along and say “I love you!” We must allow the gift of discernment which comes from the Holy Spirit, to operate in us – then we will be able to recognize the real from the fake; the wolf from the sheep – we will not believe everyone who say they love us! You can tell people who love you because they will show you that they have your best interest at hand, they are concerned about you, and that you are important to them; they will not always hurt you – talk is cheap and people can say anything out of their mouth that they don’t mean – DISCERN! DISCERN! DISCERN!!

However, if God tell you about a person and you go ahead with the relationship, you still can be emotionally crushed! Therefore, the remedies for the above issues are listening to God and following His direction!!  The bottom line is as I said before, trust in the Lord with ALL your heart, lean NOT to your own understanding but acknowledge God in ALL your ways so He can direct your path!! DO NOT put your trust (confidence) in man’s abilities – don’t even depend on your own abilities – you have none; ALL things comes from God so without God you can do nothing but with God ALL things are possible!!! God is your ONLY source and He is the ONLY One who can give you the inner fulfillment you desire – NOT another person or thing!!!!


Click here for PDF version of Part 4


Click here for PDF version of Complete Series


May God continually bless you!


Dr. Dorothy E. Hooks



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