Wednesday's Words to Live By For Jan 5th to Jan 10th Forgiving & Forgetting Part II

[Dr. Dorothy E. Hooks, PsyD]

I. Negative consequences of the absence of forgiving and forgetting:

A.  The partners in a relationship where one or both of them have not forgiven or forgot, will run the risk of:

*Continuously being hurt with pain and suffering going unresolved.

*Chronically seeking revenge and paybacks from one another.

*Being caught up in unresolved anger, animosity, and bitterness.

*Being lost in a festering wound that never realizes the revitalization of healing.

*Fear over making a mistake or of having the mistake revealed.

*Being overwhelmed by fear of failure, fear of rejection, fear of love, fear of non-approval, low self-esteem, and fear of conflict.

 

B.   Signs of the lack of forgiving and forgetting:

*Irreconcilable differences between people.

*Indifference toward one another.

*Chronic attacks or angry outbursts.

*Addressing or interacting with one another disrespectfully.

*Chronic depression.

*Seeking revenge from one another.

*Chronic recalling and reminding of past hurts and offenses.

*Suspicious about the others’ motives, behavior, attitudes, and beliefs.

*Name calling, belittling and demeaning one another.

*Responding to present behavior as if it were past behavior.

*Unwillingness to change and/or unwillingness to seek the help necessary to change.

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Shalom,

Dr. Hooks